Relationships are often undermined by automatic and repetitive mechanisms that keep us “enslaved” to reactions, expectations, illusions, disappointments, escapism, and blockages. This can happen with partners, friends, or family members…
Often, distance from others does not arise from a lack of love, but from the way we react, defend ourselves, and protect ourselves.
These mechanisms originate in childhood, where they guided and protected us, for some good reason, but when acted upon in adulthood, they keep us in unhealthy relationships.
Intimacy in a relationship grows if the feeling of being in a safe place with the other person grows, and if we relate from the perspective of the present, removing the interference of the protective instinct, the cages of the past, and the expectations of our own desires.
Discovering and observing our “survival” mechanism, the mechanism that happens automatically within us, can help us distance ourselves from it, expanding our awareness towards new paths.
Responding instead of reacting, observing and accepting instead of expecting what we “imagined” would happen… perceiving and taking responsibility for our needs creates the groundwork for intimacy.
Through awareness and watchfulness exercises, we will experience how to move from automatic reactions to conscious movements, both towards ourselves and towards others.
Intimacy can only arise from trust and openness to new ways, new understandings, new listening to our needs, in order to see and welcome others where possible, without forgetting ourselves, without obligations and without guilt.
Intimacy is not achieved: it is allowed to happen. It is the result of two presences that meet without hurry, without masks, without expecting anything — only with the willingness to truly be there.